Essential Oils For Kids With Behavioral, Mental, and Developmental Challenges

Episode Transcript

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Hi everyone, welcome to the show — I am Dr. Nicole, and today I have the pleasure of having Jodi Cohen as my guest. Jodi is an expert in using essential oils to support health and wellness, particularly for families and makes some of the best oils out there, in my opinion.

I’ve had the opportunity to try them and I’ve used them and loved them. I’ve known Jodi for a few years now and I’m just always blown away by the knowledge that she has about oils, about how to use them — particularly for what we are going to be talking about today, which is using them for kids who may have behavioral, emotional, mental health, developmental kinds of challenges, and as a mom herself, she gets that. Jodi is a best-selling author, award-winning journalist, and founder of Vibrant Blue Oils, where she has combined her training in nutritional therapy and aromatherapy to create unique proprietary blends of organic and wildcrafted essential oils that help her clients heal from brain-related challenges, including anxiety, insomnia and autoimmunity. Welcome to the show, Jodi!

Jodi:

Thank you so much for having me.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

I’m excited to dive into this because essential oils, it seems, are all the rage right now. They’re everywhere on social media, everywhere when you go to the stores. People are talking about essential oils, but I think that really parents by and large and confused about — what do I really do with these? How can I use them, how can they benefit my kids, particularly when we are talking about some of the brain-based kinds of things that a lot of families that listen to this show are dealing with. So I want to dive in by having you share some of the basics, what are essential oils? What’s the history behind them and what are they?

Jodi:

Yeah, so they’re the highly concentrated essences of plants. So basically, they’re distilled plants. So we know plants have been used throughout the centuries for medicine, they’re actually the basis for most pharmaceutical drugs. And if you concentrate them, it’s like a double-whammy dose. Like one cup of peppermint tea, a drop of essential oil is probably like 7 of them.

So the more you concentrate things, the more they can… certain challenges that we face, it’s almost like you’re so far out of balance that you need to knock yourself into balance and sometimes, really concentrated doses can do that. And especially if they’re combined and created to put something back in balance in a very specific way.

You know, if you’re zinc deficient, you’re going to megadose on zinc until you’re back up at normal, and then you’ll kind of go back into maintenance. So oils can be used — I hate to say like medicine, I think that what it is, is that when your body is in balance, it functions properly. When you’re able to eliminate the toxins you accumulate, when you’re able to sleep and nourish yourself with healthy foods, you can return to balance and heal. And when you are far out of balance, oils are a more powerful, concentrated way to help you get back into balance again.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

I really like that visual, that idea of getting into balance. And there are probably a lot of people listening who are going, “I can use that, my kids can use that.” That idea of getting back into balance. And I think what you said is really important about the power of plants. And I think that goes unrecognized. Many people are unaware, you touched on that most pharmaceuticals, most drugs that we use are based on the compounds in plants. So when we’re talking about these essences of plants, these essential oils, I think a lot of people assume, oh that’s fluffy and nice and it smells nice, but actually — there’s real power behind that, right?

Jodi:

Yeah. Well, if you think about it — our whole ecosystem works together. If you ever read those books on how trees communicate and sometimes one tree will share water with another tree, it’s like a community, we all work together. And humans are bio-familiar with plants, we are part of that community. That’s why when we eat plants or the ethically-raised animals that feed on plants, it helps us to return to balance. So there’s a symmetry in nature, that I think working with plants — we’re naturally connected. And so our body can process plants in a very easy way and it doesn’t cause weird side effects because we’re familiar with that.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Makes me think of — I was just looking at a brand new research study published this week about the connection between time spent in nature and around plants, and problems that kids have. And what this study looked at was, that as the amount of time increased that kids were spending out with trees, grass, plants and nature — the number of problems that parents are reporting in terms of things like attention issues, behavior issues, anxieties, those kinds of things went down and it’s something that I’ve just inherently known and observed from working with kids, but that’s really fascinating and something that I don’t think we think about enough, that connection to nature, and that really ties in with what you’re saying about that community and being around plants and that being something that can just be so healing for us.

Jodi:

What else has to do with it is, there are rhythms of the earth, right? There’s night and day, there’s the moon cycles and we have these natural rhythms: The rhythms of when we’re supposed to sleep, the rhythms of when we’re supposed to get hungry. And our rhythms are connected to the rhythms, obviously, of nature and the planet. So spending time in nature kind of resets our rhythms.

And when our rhythms are functioning correctly, especially with children, if their sleep cycle is off, that can really throw them off. If their eating cycle is off, if they have a bunch of snack before dinner and they’re not hungry for dinner, and then they’re starving before bedtime — the more you are on cue and on rhythm… and then babies, if they don’t nap and they get overtired — it’s really about keeping us in the flow and keeping us in the rhythms. And oils can do that, food can do that, there are a lot of things, light and darkness patterns.

The more we kind of align with the way our bodies are supposed to work, the easier it is for them to work properly. Like when we bike with the wind at our back, it’s a lot easier to go faster than when we’re biking into the wind. So what we’re really trying to do with oils is help everyone kind of line up so things just flow easier. Being a parent is so hard to begin with and when your kid is challenging, it’s even harder. So what I love about oils is it’s an easy way to make your life easier.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

And it sounds like it’s a great tool, not only for the kids — which we’re going to delve into, but for ourselves as parents, right? To support ourselves and all of us as family in addition to maybe the specific needs of our children.

Jodi:

Yeah, especially, I mean maybe there are perfect parents listening who have never had their child irritate them — but when your child irritates you, if you’re already irritated, maybe sometimes you overreact in ways that you regret later. But if you are in a more resilient place where you are able to recognize — like oh, I’m finding that irritating and I am going to handle it in a way that the best me shows up as. When you are in balance, it allows you to show up as your best self and your best parent, your best partner and your best friend — it just makes things easier because you are more grounded and stable, so you don’t get thrown off as easily.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

And I think all of us, if we’re being honest with ourselves as parents, can use more of that. Right?

Jodi:

Yeah.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

So let’s dive into why essential oils are a good choice to use with kids who have these kinds of challenges, whether it’s developmental disabilities, mental health issues, just more intense strong-willed kind behavioral issues. Why are oils a great thing to use?

Jodi:

Well, I think there are two big reasons. One thing is that the brain plays such an important role in how signals and chemicals are sent to the rest of the body, and it’s really hard to get the right remedy to the right area of the brain, because the brain is protected, there is this blood-brain barrier that keeps things out, and our sense of smell, our olfactory channel is the fastest way into the brain.

So unlike other remedies — like you can’t do chemotherapy in the brain because the brain can’t get the molecules in there. People who have taken melatonin supplements, melatonin doesn’t necessarily get into the brain. It is easier if you use a sublingual formula under the tongue. Similarly, oils have kind of the perfect chemical composition. They’re super, super small and they’re fat soluble – and the brain is mostly fat. So it’s kind of like nature created this perfect formula to get things into the brain. And when you get things to the brain, you can help to reset some of those cycles.

So the sleep cycle or the hunger cycle or the kind of nervous system cycle where they’re either be able to be calm and focus and heal, or they’re so agitated and wound up that it’s kind of impossible to get them to make eye-contact. So that’s the first reason, that they are naturally chemically organized to be ideal to get into the brain, and the second challenge is that so many people, especially children with challenges have digestive impairment.

They might have leaky gut, they might have toxic overload — there’s so much going on in their system, that it’s challenging for them to assimilate remedies through the digestive channel. And so the fact that you can topically apply something through the skin and it gets through the system or smell it, that’s a really nice back door for parents — especially that I remember when my kids were little and I would try to get them to take supplements. I would grind them up and add them to apple sauce or mix them in smoothies, or add them to muffins and it felt like such a battle to actually get the remedy into their system, so the idea that I could rub something on their feet while they were sleeping, that felt a lot easier.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

And I think that that right there, I’m sure, is resonating with so many of the parents who are listening who feel like — yeah, I know all those great things that I could be giving my kid or should be giving my kid, but getting the compliance, getting them to take it is a challenge. So what you’re saying is that this is really low-barrier to entry. This is something that we can accomplish with virtually any kid, even doing it while they are sleeping and have some benefit. And I think that really is reassuring for all the parents that want to be using different kinds of remedies and approaches, but are struggling with how to do that. So this is a relatively simple way without a lot of head butting and that kind of thing to be able to use these with kids.

Jodi:

Well, it’s a nice ritual too. My kids always loved it when I rubbed it on their feet, and my daughter went through a period where she would have anxiety at school, and we have one blend called CALM that she used to carry in her backpack, she would just put a little bit on her heart when she felt anxious and then she’d feel better. It was usually social situations like recess or lunch. And the teacher noticed right away, and how empowering for a child? Because anxiety can be scary and alienating, and to know like — oh I have a tool that I can use and I can feel better.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

And I’ve seen that with kids at the clinic too, whether it’s kids with chronic headache issues, or kids with the anxiety, or they feel themselves just getting worked up and overwhelmed or they’re having trouble focusing. Having that oil that they can use themselves, that they can start to recognize: When am I feeling this way, what’s going on — and then they can have the power to apply that and to do something for themselves that helps them at that moment. I think that’s very empowering and very helpful for them.

Jodi:

With also things like constipation, that can be such a big issue and it can get so stressful. And we have an oil for it too, we have one you can apply right behind the earlobe on the mastoid bone, on the vagus nerve and that helps the whole motility cascade in the digestive tract, but then also that CALM oil, when you put it on your tummy, constipation can be anxiety-related and instead of it becoming a whole conundrum, you can send your child in the bathroom by themselves with oils and empower them, and it kind of takes the edge off of something that is already stressful, and that’s such an important part of healing, is eliminating your waste and your toxins.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Absolutely. So you touched on some of the reasons why these can be so helpful to use. I’m wondering too, it strikes me that so many of the things that are recommended for kids with these issues center around medications and medications that can have very, very scary and negative side effect profiles. Can you talk about that a little bit with essential oils? Because it strikes me that one of the great things about using essential oils is that we have the possibility of getting benefits in these areas without all of the potentially dangerous side effects that we might get from some other kinds of treatments.

Jodi:

Yeah, and I really try not to go negative on anything, the ones thing I will say is that the valerian root was kind of the formulation for Valium, white willow bark became Aspirin — but in order to patent the drug you have to make some changes. It can’t be found in nature. Which is why Vitamin D has never been patented, because somebody would make a million on it. But when you change it, you have to modify it ever so slightly.

So the way someone described it is, if you hold your hand up in the mirror and you see the mirror reflection of your hand, it’s kind of your hand but it’s backwards. So when they make these drugs, not everything is kind of in alignment with nature, so there might be some mild changes that can trigger different side effects. And since oils come from nature, it’s unlikely that they will have side effects. With that said, I think there are certain ways that you can use them that I think are more effect.

The analogy that I use is — our 90 year old neighbor has a cellphone that his grandchildren gave him. And he uses it to make phone calls and to receive phone calls. And my children are always trying to teach him — you can take photos with it, you can send email, you can get directions — and that’s not really of interest to him. He just wants it to be his phone, and that’s not wrong but it’s just scratching the surface of the potential. And I think with oils, you can certainly put lavender in your bath and it’s amazing and it smells good — and there’s nothing wrong with that. Or you can use oils and combine them into blends that are able to help you heal in even more powerful ways.

And I think that what’s nice about the oils is that they are pretty natural they don’t usually cause side effects and you can combine them in a way where your body is very familiar to them. And so it allows the body to return to balance, and it makes it easier for you to heal.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Love it. So let’s get into some specific types of oils, because I know parents listening are probably having lots of questions about — which oils should I use for different things? So one of the really common ones that comes up with kids for this whole range of issues is anxiety. That is such a driving force for a lot of the behavioral kinds of challenges and issues that kids are dealing with, so what are your suggestions around oils for anxiety?

Jodi:

The first thing, I mean — there are so many things that are happening in the body, in the brain when you’re anxious. We’re really designed for survival, right? So when we see any kind of danger, be it a real danger, a thought of danger, our nervous system switches into that fight/flight/freeze zone called the sympathetic state of the nervous system, and that gets turned on and I remember when my kids were little, they used to always say connect before you correct.

If your kid did something wrong and you’re upset and they’re upset and you start to scream at them, they’re not going to hear you because they’re in that dangerous sympathetic state where the whole body is mobilized to either fight or flee, so anything that doesn’t help you fight or flee, like your ability to digest food, detoxify or even focus on your mom is kind of turned off. Like with my son, I used to point at my nose and say look at my nose, and he couldn’t — he was all over that place, because he was in that sympathetic state.

The easiest way to get your child back into that rest, digest and heal parasympathetic state — which is the first state to kind of getting them out of that danger zone, so that they can start to deal with the anxiety — is to help them drop into this parasympathetic state. And this is a little complicated but I am going to try and make it as simple as possible. The off/on switch between this fight or flight sympathetic state and rest and digest parasympathetic state is this vagus nerve.

This very important cranial nerve that starts at the very back of the head and winds around on both sides, right behind the ear, and it’s most accessible to the surface right there, so we have an oil that you can put right behind the earlobe, kind of on that bone if you feel it. And that is kind of the on/off switch. So they’re agitated, they’re all over the place, you can put that oil right there and it helps them just drop into that rest, digest and heal.

You can even try this at home, say you’re like, “Hey, look at my nose!” — they can’t do it, put the oil on and try it again and you’ll notice. Their pupils will kind of constrict a little, they’ll be able to focus, it’s good for you too, you’ll have a much better connection and a much better experience. And so that’s kind of the first step, telling the brain to calm down, it’s okay — we’re safe, there’s no danger, you don’t need to be anxious and on high alert, it’s safe. So that’s a really good one to start with.

And then another one, the next step — the brain then sends these chemical signals, it starts at the hypothalamus and goes to the pituitary and winds up at the adrenal glands which release the streets hormones, so sometimes that message kind of — they’re so prepared for emergencies, that they’re constantly releasing the stress hormones. So if you can tell them the emergency is over, it’s safe, it’s kind of like the fire drill in the school — you can kind of go back in the classroom now, you’re good.

And you can do that with an adrenal oil which is also great for moms, which you can also put over your adrenals on your lower back. And another trick that I learned from our colleague Titus Chew, sometimes anxiety is related to an overactive right frontal lobe and so one way to calm that down is to smell something through your left nostril because then that turns on the left frontal lobe and it puts you into balance, so it could be lavender, it could be the parasympathetic blend, the adrenal blend — it’s just an easy trick and for anyone who is prone to anxiety attacks, that works really quickly.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Great, so you mentioned the parasympathetic blend and the adrenal blend. What types of plant oils are in those blends? What kinds of oils are especially good for getting into the parasympathetic state or the sort of relaxing and managing anxiety?

Jodi:

There are definitely single oils that are good for that, I tend to work with blends because I think when you combine things, it makes them more powerful — for example, the parasympathetic blend is two oils, it’s clove and lime. Clove is super stimulatory and lime has the smallest molecules, so it gets it — the nerve is accessible here, it’s kind of the fastest way to get into the system and calm it down.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

And the smells amazing, it’s one of my favorites — it sounds like such a weird combination if people are like “Hmm! Clove and lime!” But it smells amazing.

Jodi:

Yeah, and one of the other interesting things: Clove has actually been used in dentistry through the years, so sometimes, not so much for little kids but for us moms who might have any kind of germs in the mouth, the trigeminal nerves in the mouth, kind of drains at the point behind the ear as well, so that can cause a bit of a bottleneck just in terms of signaling and so cloves kind of goes and cleans up the bottleneck, a little bit. So think of a traffic jam and suddenly the traffic starts moving, it just allows the signal to go through a little bit better. And the adrenal blend is a combination.

It’s thyme, rosemary, manuka, frankincense and galbanum and it seems like a weird combination, but there’s something about — what we’re really trying to do is create a similar balance to what healthy adrenals looks like. Like if you are ever playing tennis with a better player or running — I used to run a 9-minute mile, sometimes I’d run with 8-minute mile people and you find yourself keeping the pace, you kind of match what your put up with. So if you overlay kind of what healthy adrenal tissue — that resonance, it sometimes rises to that occasion and puts the organ back in balance.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Nice. You mentioned lavender too, and I think that’s one that many people are familiar with.

Jodi:

Lavender’s amazing, it’s like the all-round player on the soccer team — it can do everything and it’s great for kids, it’s really balancing — what’s nice about it is that it kind of matches where you’re at. So if you need to calm down, it can calm you down. If you have a headache and you need to focus, it can be used for that. Lavender across the board, I think, works nicely for most people, for most conditions.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

So it’s like an MVP kind of oil for sure.

Jodi:

Exactly.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

How about sleep? Because you mentioned sleep, and a lot of kids with developmental disabilities, with mental health issues, sleep is a major issue for them. Either not being able to settle down, to fall asleep, not being able to sleep through the night — what are some of the essential oils that you find can be useful for that?

Jodi:

Definitely lavender. It’s kind of different levels. And I think there are different issues with falling asleep and then also staying asleep. So if it’s just a little bit, you just want to calm your kid, they’re a little restless, lavender on the feet, or I love Mark Hyman’s epsom salt bath. 2 cups of epsom salt, 1 cup of baking soda, a couple of drops of lavender, mix the lavender with the epsom salt before you add water, and you can just cut that in half for kids — so 1 cup epsom salt, 1/2 a cup baking soda and lavender and just the combination of the magnesium in the epsom salt and the lavender and the oil is very calming — so if you just kind of have a kid that needs a little bit of calming at night, that’s a good one — we also have a calm blend and a sleep blend that are good.

If it’s slightly more complicated, we kind of talked about being in balance with the right rhythms — sometimes our sleep rhythm, which we call our circadian rhythm, gets a little thrown off and that can happen when our sleep cycle, the sleep hormone melatonin works in tandem with the stress hormone, cortisol. They have kind of an antagonistic relationship. So if you’re anxious or wired and your body is releasing all of this cortisol, it’s a little bit like a teeter totter. Cortisol’s high, that forces melatonin to be low, which makes sense because if there was an actual emergency, you wouldn’t want to fall asleep. You’d want the energy to survive.

So we have one oil that we call circadian rhythm, and what it does is it triggers the part of your brain that releases melatonin, the pineal gland to naturally release melatonin, and this works really well for kids that are kind of okay through the day, and then they just have this huge anxiety at night, they get really anxious, they start getting OCD, they need one more glass of water, one more book, they can’t settle down, so this blend — circadian rhythm, helps them really settle down and calm down, and it’s also a great back door to helping manage anxiety because it releases that sleep hormone, which is a bit of an anti-anxiety hormone and it kind of puts them back in balance. So that’s for challenges in falling asleep.

When you wake up in the middle of the night, it can be different things. You know, a lot of moms after their babies have blood sugar wake ups. So it’s 1 AM, we are wide awake, we can go clean the kitchen, nothing is getting us back to sleep. So what’s happening is the blood sugar dipped a little low and the adrenals released kind of the emergency blood sugar hormone, and then we’re wide awake.

So if you think how the body naturally handles that, the pancreas is kind of what helps move the blood sugar out of the blood and into the cells, so we have an oil that supports the pancreas, and so in doing that and helping to get all that high alert energy out of the system, it helps you fall back asleep. And then the other time that people wake up is kind of around 3 A.M and that’s usually when your liver and your detoxification organs are just working a little bit too hard, so anything you can do to support the liver, be it taking some kind of binder before you go to bed, or we have an oil for the liver and gallbladder, that just helps give them a little extra support so that the liver can relax and let us sleep.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Awesome. You’ve mentioned a couple of different ways of using them. I want to just highlight for parents who may be have had no exposure to essential oils — what do I do with them? Do I just dump the bottle on them? You mentioned getting it on their feet — what are some of the best ways to actually use or apply with oils with children.

Jodi:

First of all, less is more — don’t ever dump the bottle, maybe take one drop and if you’ve never put it on your child before, dilute it. You can just use olive oil or coconut oil from your kitchen, but people may get incredibly complicated, you can just use your hand. Put a teeny bit of coconut oil in your hand and one drop of say lavender and just mix it with your finger, and then put it on the bottom of their feet. You don’t ever want to put it like, if someone is having an eczema eruption or something, don’t put essential oils on damaged skin, don’t put it on cuts because if it’s damaged, that means that it’s going to get into your system faster, so the bottom of the feet is the safest place to apply it because the skin is pretty thick and also, there are a lot of reflex points that affect other areas of the body.

So if you’re an essential oil newbie: Dilute it, put it on bottom of the skin and go slow. It’s kind of like a haircut, right? If you cut too much, you can’t grow back — you can always cut more. Start with less and you can always layer on more if you want to. And then the way we use oils is we find that there are certain reflex points and organ points that if you put the oils directly on top of the organ, they seem to assimilate into the system more quickly.  

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Okay. So that’s what you were talking about with the liver and the gallbladder, or even kids sometimes when they’re having a tummy ache, I know that putting right on the spot where they have the tummy ache or a tension headache or those kind of things?

Jodi:

Exactly. And for the tummy, I always tell them to kind of rub it around the belly button clockwise, that seems to work. We’ve tested clockwise, counterclockwise — for some reason clockwise seems to work better.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Awesome. And I know a lot of kids who do really well with a massage on their feet before bed, throw some socks on over it and that’s part of the bedtime ritual or after school ritual, whatever. It’s a nice time of connection with your kids too and that in and of itself helps to calm and regroup and all of that.

Jodi:

Yeah, and actually, my son used to have some sensory things, so one of the things we learned was if you pull, push, twist, twist with fingers or toes, you can teach them to do that — it’s really calming. My kids used to love that so I would integrate that in with the foot massage.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Great. Talk just briefly, because we could go on and on — there are so many other questions I have but we’re going to have to wrap up here shortly, but I do want to make sure that we touch on the issue of quality with oils because they’re so popular right now, they’re everywhere — I have parents can come into the clinic and say, you know I found this on the shelf at the local chain dollar store or whatever, and I know there’s a big difference quality-wise. So can you speak to that for a moment?

Jodi:

Yeah, absolutely. And first of all, again, I don’t want to get too much into scare tactics, it’s kind of like if you find an apple at a 7/11 — it’s probably not organic, but it’s an apple. What I like about organics, they’re so concentrated — oils are so concentrated, so if they’re grown with a lot of pesticides or chemicals, your kind of concentrating all of those pesticides and chemicals and that’s my concern, especially that so many of us who have health challenges, it’s a little bit like toxic overload — you really want to make sure you’re not layering that into it. I also think, trust your sense of smell. I think that the toxic ones, if you go into the mall into some of those candle stores — you’re like, oh my God!

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Instant migraine for me.

Jodi:

I know, but I think a lot of people have a good sense and there are a lot of good, trusted brands.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

For sure, this has been so helpful to give people a good introductory understanding of what these are and how to use them. I want to make sure they know where to find more information from you, because not only do you have your awesome products online, but you’ve got great information available, so what do you have to share with people? How can they find you?

Jodi:

They can find me at www.vibrantblueoils.com and if they have any questions, they can email us at info@vibrantblueoils.com and I was telling you, I made an essential oil guide for families that was mostly made for myself and my friends, because I couldn’t really find just a beginner’s guide that gave a good overview of all the things that I was interested in for my kids. And it’s got some great tips like what we use, I have a spray bottle to prevent lice — it’s just essential oils. So we got lice ones. That’s kind of my thing, we make a mistake once, we don’t do it again. And we went to that expensive lice place and realized — oh my gosh they’re just using essential oils! And you know you get those scary emails and you’re like, no we’re good. We haven’t had it since. So those kinds of things, just really quick and dirty, easy tools to use.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Practical tips, which we can all use. So people can go to vibrantblueoils.com then and download that, and we’ll have a specific link for that along with the show notes so that you can easily find that. Jodi also has an amazing book called ‘Healing with Essential Oils’ that has tons of great information if you want to delve more into that. And they can find that probably on amazon or on your website as well, right?

Jodi:

Yeah, Amazon.

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Wonderful. Jodi, thank you so much for being with us on the show today. I know this information was super helpful for people, so thank you.

Jodi:

Thank you!

Dr. Nicole Beurkens:

Alright, everybody — thanks for listening and we will see you next time on our next episode of the Better Behavior Show!